Thursday, November 24, 2011

I'm A Little Worried About Your Guarding, Because I Don't Think You're Smart Enough To Close Your Mouth When You Jump In

I went into my second semester of that year in a really good place.  I was now dating a really great guy, Josh, and my classes were extremely interesting.  I'd also made a friend in three of my classes, Ian, and had my other good friend, Mike, in another.  I had my surgery planned for reading week, and was hoping it would turn out well.

Josh and I progressed in our relationship extremely quickly.  I was shocked at how easy it was to talk about my health problems with him, because he really seemed to understand and sympathize with me.  We almost immediately began seeing each other daily, and told each other we loved each other in only two weeks.  Leading up to February, we even started talking about moving in together.  He'd lived in Vancouver previously, and so he was ready to leave his parents house again.  I'd never lived without my parents, and I knew that it was way too soon, but everything seemed right, so it was looking like a good idea.

One day I had to get an MRI on my shoulder, the MRI that would show my orthopedic surgeon exactly what he was going to have to deal with when he went in there.  Dad drove me to the hospital and went in to wait with me.  This MRI was a lot different; I needed to have dye in the joint so he could see exactly what was going to show up.  So we went it, and I changed into the hospital clothes and answers the zillions of questions to the MRI technician guy.  Then I went into the room where they were to insert the dye.  I really had no idea what was going to happen here, and am happy I didn't, because otherwise I'd have freaked out beforehand.  I laid down on the table, and the put a bunch of sterilizer over my left shoulder.  The doctor who got to deal with inserting the dye came in.  He was a pretty nice guy, very funny, which is always nice.  They put the freezing into my shoulder first, which involved a massive needle going into my shoulder, and local anesthetic being put in.  If you've ever gotten a needle put in your arm, it was kind of like that, but the needle was about a foot long and you couldn't look anywhere without seeing it.  After that, we started up the xray machine that would show him where the needle was the entire time.  I decided to stare at the room and chat with the man, so I only got to see tools when the guy lifted them high up (which did happen a couple of times).  I did get to see a few images of my shoulder with a giant needle going into the joint, which I considered making my Christmas card, but other than that it just looked like there was a huge hole in my shoulder that he was shoving needles in and out of, like a bunch of straws into a really thin glass.  My shoulder got filled up with dye, and it really did hurt.  Keep in mind, I still had raw bone in this shoulder, and there was needles bumping against it and foreign liquid caressing it.  Anyway, once that was over, we had to wait a little while, and then got the MRI.  On the way home, I told Dad that Josh and I were thinking of moving out, expecting a bit of anger.  Dad told me I just needed to think things through, and that he wouldn't be mad at me and loved me no matter what.  Best dad ever.

The MRI ended up showing a little tab on my bone, which could get caught and lock ever so often, and also a big bit of bone hovering around the joint, which would cause pain and a fun clicking noise.  The last thing I asked the doctor in the appointment before the surgery was "Can you give me the pictures from inside the joint?"

School was going great at this time!  I had told my teachers that I would be away for a little while, and they all really understood and were willing to help in any way I needed.  Ian and Mike both were very willing to help me with anything I missed or didn't understand while I was gone, which was really nice of them.  They're both VERY good people.

Work wasn't going so well at this time.  I was a Shift Leader at this time, and another Shift Leader decided to start telling everyone that because of my health problems, I couldn't save anyone and was unreliable.  This was a ridiculous statement; I've always been very careful about how much I can do, and if for some reason my health was bad enough to make saving someone difficult, I would ask someone to cover for me.  However, word got around and I looked like an unreliable idiot.  I ended up pulling the Shift Leader into the First Aid room and told him there was obviously some problem, and that if he felt that he should confirm it with me instead of telling everyone else about it.  I asked what he was concerned about and shot all the issues down.  However, he enjoyed being a massive drama queen and continued to spread the lie.  This got me very upset, as I really liked working there.  I was a good lifeguard, and it hurt me to think that people thought otherwise.  Since then, I've vowed to not work in a place that was primarily women and catty men, as it seems to cause problems, and I'm an easy target.  Being a computer scientist, this is going to be a pretty easy vow to keep, kind of like vowing to breathe.  The place I work in now is amazing, full of supportive and fun people (all men!) and I don't really ever want to leave.  Anyway, I digress.  I had my leave time planned with my boss for when I was going to get surgery.  I wanted to be back pretty soon, as soon as I could, because I did like it, and I needed the money.  Everything was working out quite well.

I went into the start of reading week feeling very confident that things would turn out like they should.  I felt like I'd have enough bad luck, and it was about time things went my way.